N\u00ebse ndiheni t\u00eb tronditur nga humbja e nj\u00eb lidhjeje, kjo nuk ndodh sepse dikush nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb n\u00eb jet\u00ebn tuaj. Ju mbani zi p\u00ebr iden\u00eb q\u00eb kishit p\u00ebr at\u00eb se si do t\u00eb ishte e ardhmja juaj dhe \u00e7far\u00eb do t\u00eb thot\u00eb se ky person nuk do t\u00eb jet\u00eb m\u00eb pjes\u00eb e juaja, si\u00e7 mund ta kishit planifikuar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ideja q\u00eb ne “humbasim” nj\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie vjen nga ideja se ne gjithashtu mund t\u00eb “fitojm\u00eb” nj\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie kur jemi mjaft t\u00eb mir\u00eb, dhe t\u00eb zgjuar dhe t\u00eb lezetsh\u00ebm dhe n\u00eb p\u00ebrgjith\u00ebsi “m\u00eb t\u00eb mir\u00eb” se \u00e7do partner ose mik i ardhsh\u00ebm q\u00eb mund t\u00eb konkurroj\u00eb me ne n\u00eb nj\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie me t\u00eb dashurin ton\u00eb. Por jeta nuk funksionon n\u00eb at\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ne nuk i humbim marr\u00ebdh\u00ebniet, thjesht mbyllim rrethin e tyre. Nuk ka asnj\u00eb kod q\u00eb thot\u00eb se \u00e7do person q\u00eb takojm\u00eb n\u00eb jet\u00ebn ton\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb i destinuar t\u00eb q\u00ebndroj\u00eb p\u00ebrgjithmon\u00eb n\u00eb t\u00eb. N\u00eb fakt, shum\u00eb, shum\u00eb njer\u00ebz do t\u00eb q\u00ebndrojn\u00eb me ne p\u00ebr pjes\u00ebn tjet\u00ebr t\u00eb jet\u00ebs son\u00eb.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Dhe kjo nuk do t\u00eb thot\u00eb q\u00eb ne jemi prapa n\u00eb dashuri. As nuk ka ndonj\u00eb q\u00eb thot\u00eb se \u00e7do marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie q\u00eb keni \u00ebsht\u00eb e destinuar t\u00eb zbehet n\u00eb nj\u00eb far\u00eb m\u00ebnyre. Kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb p\u00ebr shkak t\u00eb faktit se gjat\u00eb zhvillimit t\u00eb jet\u00ebs tuaj ju evoluoni. Ti ndryshon.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ti je ndryshe. Marr\u00ebdh\u00ebniet vijn\u00eb n\u00eb jet\u00ebn tuaj, ato ciklohen, ju ndryshojn\u00eb n\u00eb nj\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb t\u00eb r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme dhe m\u00eb pas e mbyllin at\u00eb.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Marr\u00ebdh\u00ebniet nuk jan\u00eb shp\u00ebtimi q\u00eb do t\u00eb na shp\u00ebtojn\u00eb nga vetmia. Ju nuk mund t\u00eb kufizoheni vazhdimisht n\u00eb t\u00eb qenit t\u00eb mir\u00eb dhe t\u00eb pranuesh\u00ebm me q\u00ebllimin p\u00ebrfundimtar p\u00ebr t\u00eb siguruar q\u00eb njer\u00ebzit nuk do t’ju l\u00ebn\u00eb kurr\u00eb.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Marr\u00ebdh\u00ebniet vijn\u00eb dhe shkojn\u00eb, kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb ajo q\u00eb ata jan\u00eb krijuar p\u00ebr t\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb. Ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb, ata largohen shpejt. Disa prej tyre l\u00ebn\u00eb nj\u00eb dhimbje akute. T\u00eb tjerat zbehen dhe nganj\u00ebher\u00eb ne verbohemi nga largimi i tyre episodik. Ka raste kur ne as nuk e kuptojm\u00eb se \u00e7far\u00eb ka ndodhur derisa t\u00eb jet\u00eb tep\u00ebr von\u00eb.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Por ka edhe nga ata q\u00eb tregojn\u00eb shenja paralajm\u00ebruese; atje disa prej nesh p\u00ebrpiqen t\u00eb mbajn\u00eb at\u00eb q\u00eb ka mbetur, t\u00eb tjer\u00ebt vendosim t\u00eb largohemi. Sido q\u00eb t\u00eb jet\u00eb, n\u00ebse nj\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie largohet nga jeta juaj, ka nj\u00eb arsye p\u00ebr t\u00eb. Ka nj\u00eb pjes\u00eb t\u00eb saj q\u00eb nuk ju sjell m\u00eb dobi. Ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb ju keni m\u00eb shum\u00eb p\u00ebrgjegj\u00ebsi, ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb jo. Analizimi i asaj q\u00eb ndodhi dhe marrja e p\u00ebrgjegj\u00ebsis\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb pjes\u00eb kritike e procesit t\u00eb sh\u00ebrimit dhe evolucionit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Por vet\u00eb-shpifja p\u00ebr \u00e7do marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie q\u00eb keni humbur n\u00eb jet\u00ebn tuaj \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb humbje e v\u00ebrtet\u00eb kohe dhe bazohet n\u00eb besimin e rrem\u00eb se n\u00ebse nuk do t\u00eb ishit m\u00eb mir\u00eb, t\u00eb gjith\u00eb do t\u00eb q\u00ebndronin me ju.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Jo, ata nuk do t\u00eb q\u00ebndronin. Marr\u00ebdh\u00ebniet p\u00ebrfundojn\u00eb kur vjen koha q\u00eb ato t\u00eb p\u00ebrfundojn\u00eb. Ata p\u00ebrfundojn\u00eb kur duhet t\u00eb p\u00ebrfundojn\u00eb. Ne vijm\u00eb n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb jet\u00eb vet\u00ebm dhe gjithashtu e l\u00ebm\u00eb at\u00eb vet\u00ebm. Ata q\u00eb njohim gjat\u00eb rrug\u00ebs, sado t\u00eb p\u00ebrkohsh\u00ebm t\u00eb jen\u00eb, vijn\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb na udh\u00ebhequr n\u00eb nj\u00eb vend pajtimi me veten.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u00c7far\u00ebdo emocionesh q\u00eb shkakton humbja e nj\u00eb personi tek ju nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb problemi i tij p\u00ebr ta zgjidhur at\u00eb. \u00cbsht\u00eb i juaji. Esht\u00eb nj\u00eb vrim\u00eb q\u00eb po p\u00ebrpiqeni t\u00eb mbushni me nj\u00eb person tjet\u00ebr q\u00eb nuk d\u00ebshiron t\u00eb luaj\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb rol n\u00eb jet\u00ebn tuaj, q\u00eb do t\u00eb thot\u00eb se nuk keni pun\u00eb ta vendosni at\u00eb atje, ta detyroni t\u00eb q\u00ebndroj\u00eb dhe ta faj\u00ebsoni n\u00ebse ai nuk e pranon at\u00eb.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb, m\u00ebnyra se si nj\u00eb person largohet nga jeta jon\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00ebsimi q\u00eb duhet t\u00eb m\u00ebsojm\u00eb. T\u00eb tjer\u00ebt, mungesa e tyre \u00ebsht\u00eb p\u00ebrvoja q\u00eb duhet t\u00eb p\u00ebrjetojm\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb rimarr\u00eb kontrollin e jet\u00ebs son\u00eb. Po aq udh\u00ebzues \u00ebsht\u00eb kuptimi se ne ishim egoist\u00eb dhe mosmir\u00ebnjoh\u00ebs kur kishim nj\u00eb person t\u00eb madh n\u00eb jet\u00ebn ton\u00eb.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Por ajo q\u00eb nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb pjes\u00eb e jet\u00ebs suaj nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb nevoja juaj, edhe n\u00ebse ende nuk mund ta shihni qart\u00eb pse \u00ebsht\u00eb her\u00ebt.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ju nuk keni p\u00ebr q\u00ebllim t\u00eb jeni me njer\u00ebzit q\u00eb ju l\u00ebn\u00eb, as nuk jeni gjithmon\u00eb p\u00ebrgjegj\u00ebs p\u00ebr largimin e tyre. Duke pranuar rrjedh\u00ebn dhe rregullat e jet\u00ebs, kalueshm\u00ebrin\u00eb e gj\u00ebrave, ju do t\u00eb m\u00ebsoni t’i doni njer\u00ebzit p\u00ebr aq koh\u00eb sa i keni dhe t\u00eb jeni mir\u00ebnjoh\u00ebs p\u00ebr ta kur ata t\u00eb jen\u00eb zhdukur.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Briana Wiest<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
N\u00ebse ndiheni t\u00eb tronditur nga humbja e nj\u00eb lidhjeje, kjo nuk ndodh sepse dikush nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb n\u00eb jet\u00ebn tuaj. Ju mbani zi p\u00ebr iden\u00eb q\u00eb kishit p\u00ebr at\u00eb se si do t\u00eb ishte e ardhmja juaj dhe \u00e7far\u00eb do t\u00eb thot\u00eb se ky person nuk do t\u00eb jet\u00eb m\u00eb pjes\u00eb e juaja, si\u00e7 mund […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3337,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"tdm_status":"","tdm_grid_status":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[521],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-4117","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-psikologji"},"yoast_head":"\n